carry your heart with me
by claraoswalds
Summary: Lydia's definition of love is like this: falling in love can either break you or save you.


Lydia's definition of love is like this:

_Falling in love can either break you or save you._

**i.**

She was picking up food for her mother and herself in the supermarket when she saw him.

He was standing in the cereal aisle, with his father, wearing a plaid shirt (Lydia wonders if he has any other shirts than plaid because _honestly_, she rolled her eyes) and holding a cereal box while talking with his father.

And the most surprising thing is that –

_His hair._

Stiles's hair is longer and she watched as he put his hand through his hair and God, doesn't that look attractive and she kept staring until she realised that she has been goggling her – _friend? classmate? – _and that she should go home.

Well. Until Stiles turned around and saw her. ("Fucking great," she muttered under her breath) He waved at her and whispered something to his father before jogging towards her. She felt panicked because what do you say to a guy who she hasn't seen him since the end of last semester and _since when did he get this attractive? _

"Hey, Lydia!"

And she put on her best smile and look at him.

"Oh, hey Stiles,"

"It's been a while, right?" he said, standing awkwardly in front of her.

"Yeah, it has. How's Scott?" she asked.

"He's great, a bit sad over Allison but overall, he's doing amazing, um, how are you?" he said, rubbing the back of his neck (– a sign that's he's obviously nervous, Lydia thought, she read that somewhere)

"Superb, I think I'm gonna go –," she said and she swore she could see hurt in his eyes but he quickly covered it up with a smile.

"Oh of course, just saying hi, that's all," he said, walking away.

And Lydia, who felt slightly guilty, reached out to grab his arm. He looked surprised and turned around, raising an eyebrow at her.

"You look good, by the way,"

Somehow, that made his day. (maybe his 10 year plan is going to work, after all)

**ii.**

"Is he going to be fine?"

"He is, don't worry,"

(lies, those are just lies)

**iii.**

_This isn't him._

She looks at him, holding a knife and smirking – it's him but it isn't really him. This isn't Stiles, the sarcastic, skinny, with a bat as a defense boy she had known of. This is someone else, controlling him, his body and his mind.

This is someone she's afraid of.

"Don't even try to scream or I will rip your throat out,"

She doesn't show him that she's scared because fact no 1) Lydia Martin doesn't break down easily so she takes a deep breath and put on a straight face. He smiles and it gave her goosebumps because Stiles doesn't smile like that – he doesn't look at you like that. _No._

"You should have known that fox are smarter, more intelligent that you can ever be, Lydia Martin, you can never beat a fox," he says, inching closer and closer, putting the knife near her throat.

"Not her," he says. He looks at her as though trying to know all her secrets, all her fears and she felt somehow naked despite wearing a coat and clothes underneath.

"_Not her_. Oh, Stiles, lose it, I'm just having a little fun,"

And that's when she understands. That there's still Stiles inside that body, that's he trying to free himself.

"Fight him, Stiles," _He_ turns around and the smile fade. He points the knife directly at her throat and she gulps.

"Your Stiles is gone, oh, darling, it's too late now," and the way he says "darling" made her more scared and the hair behind her neck stood because this isn't him _this isn't him_ she wants Stiles back, please, oh please –

"I'm not scared," she says, bravely (because she isn't going to back down, not when there's hope)

"You should be,"

**iv.**

Love is dangerous.

It can hurt you and tore your heart apart and left it shattered on the ground. For Lydia, love is something that should be afraid of but somehow you can never get rid of.

Her parents used to be happy. Used to be smiling and kissing each other on a bright sunny day. Gives Lydia books about fairytales and reads her happy stories. Her life used to be filled with portraits of happy family and drawings of a great day in the Martin's household.

(oh how things could change)

And then came the screaming. The breaking things. Those days were the worst. It made little Lydia cry in the corner, without anyone comforting her. In the end, divorce was the answer and Lydia's father said goodbye with only a kiss in the head and a whisper of a "I love you" in her ear.

She used to ask her mother after moving in Beacon Hills (to get away from the past, her mother said – she turned only 13 when she started to get rid of the silly dolls and fairytales books that were only filled with lies and stupid happy endings)

"Why do you hate Dad so much?"

Her mother looked at her, shocked but then she gave her a smile before reaching out to grab her hand.

"I don't hate your Dad, it's just – we drifted apart and well, we fell out of love,"

"Do you used to love Dad?" she asked, again, curious.

"Of course I do, Lydia. Your father was a really charming man and managed to impress with his good looks and silly jokes. I loved your Dad, very much and there's always a part of me that will always love your dad,"

"Now, let's go get something to eat, alright?"

Lydia nodded and faked a smile (a trick she learned since she was very young)

**v.**

"Aren't you afraid of me? I'm a monster. I am going crazy. I am losing my mind,"

"I will save you,"

(because she's his emotional tether and she will do anything to help him)

**vi.**

She once read that true love's kiss could break any spell.

Does that also apply to a possessed human boy?

"What are you doing here, banshee?" he said, saying banshee as though it's a curse word that he should never spoke.

"Stiles, you can do this. You are strong –"

"He isn't here," he said, smirking, "I told you before and I will tell you now, girl, he is gone, I am in complete control of this body and I will destroy all the ones he loved so much, and maybe I will start with _you_,"

He walked closer and closer and she could see him more closely – the eyebags under his eyes were darker and there were blood on his shirt but she didn't know who it was and she rather not know.

Suddenly, she remembered the story of how Prince Charming waking Snow White with a true love's kiss; a story she remembered so well because her father loved to read her that before she sleep. She looks at Stiles and hope that it could work on him – she doesn't care if it doesn't even make sense or if that life isn't a fairytale story but hey, nothing is impossible and she could at least _try._

So she quickly walked at him and kissed him. _He _was surprise and try to resist but then he kiss her back, a little more hard. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the kiss, more than she should and put her hand through his hair just like how she imagined all those times in class and it made her heart beat faster, faster like it's gonna rip out any second.

And then she pulled away to breathe and she finally opened her eyes to look at him. He was trying to catch his breath and when he looked up, he smiled but this time it isn't the evil smile that made her scared or afraid – _this is Stiles._

"Stiles?"

"Yeah, it's me,"

"Really?" she asked because she's still confused and she wants to make sure that's it really, really him because well, she doesn't want to go through it all over again.

"Yes, it's me, Lydia. I'm Stiles Stilinski, the son of John Stilinski who likes eating all types of food, especially pizza because who doesn't love pizza? I like Star Wars and is the best friend of Scott and we play lacrosse and is also a freakin werewolf and I also has a crush on you since the third grade. Also the nogitsune is a fucking pain in the ass, to be honest,"

She put her arms around him and she smiles because _finally this is Stiles and she has him back _and he put his arms around her waist and they hold each other until Scott and the others found them.

**iv.**

Maybe falling in love can be dangerous.

But it doesn't matter because falling in love can make you happy, it can make you smile for the rest of the day without a reason. It doesn't matter because everyone deserves happiness (except for those villains who kills innocent people or used people to bring him back to life, like, for example, a certain Hale call Peter that she would not mind being dead) And for Lydia, her happiness comes in the form of Stiles Stilinski.

The nogitsune inside him is finally gone and the door in his mind is finally "closed". Everything is finally back to normal, even Isaac is finally cured and well. It reminds her of what everything used to be in her household. Not that it matters anymore, she has her friends now.

"You okay?" Stiles asked, nudging her on her shoulder. She snapped out of her trance and looked at him. She gave him a smile and nodded. She watched as Kira laughs at something Isaac said, while Allison and Scott are fighting, hands against hands because apparently Allison "could kick Scott's ass" in fighting and well, it started a fight between them, of course.

Derek, however, was talking to the Sheriff, Chris and Melissa in one group. It made her smile whenever she see everyone just hanging out like this without a worry in their minds that something bad is coming (there probably is because let's be honest, Beacon Hills is not a normal town)

"I love you," she whispered in his ear as she put her head on her shoulder.

"I love you too," he kissed her forehead and put an arm around her.

**vi.**

_Falling in love can break you or save you._

Stiles could easily break her but she knew, no matter what, he will always save her.


End file.
